It’s official: Lubbock is so charming that the Lubbock Police Department had to respond to a staggering 2,129 suicidal subject calls in 2025. That’s roughly six calls a day from people who looked at our majestic brown horizons and endless rows of chain restaurants and thought, “I’ve seen enough.” To put that in perspective, Lubbock consistently outpaces the Texas and national averages for suicide rates, proving once and for all that we really are overachievers when it comes to being miserable.
To handle this cry for help, the LPD and StarCare have teamed up for a “co-responder” program. It’s basically a buddy system where a licensed mental health peace officer and a StarCare professional ride around together like a depressed version of Miami Vice. Their goal is to “de-escalate,” which in Lubbock terms means trying to convince someone that the upcoming dust storm season is actually a reason to keep living.
The most heartwarming part? Corporal Ethan Noble pointed out that officers actually have to want to do this. “It’s not anything that anybody can force you to do,” he said, confirming that in our local police force, treating a mental health crisis with actual empathy is strictly an elective. It’s nice to know that when you’re at your lowest, the guy showing up at your door is there because he opted into the “Don’t Just Handcuff Them” seminar.
Bobby Carter from StarCare tried to put a positive spin on the 2,129 calls by saying people are just “more open to asking for help.” Sure, Bobby. It definitely couldn’t be the lack of elevation, the smell of the feedlots, or the fact that our primary cultural landmark is a statue of a guy who left town the second he got famous. We’re not in crisis; we’re just communicative.
If you’re feeling the Lubbock Blues, they suggest calling the 988 hotline or StarCare directly instead of 911, probably so the “voluntary” mental health officers can finish their lunch in peace.
With stats this high, maybe it’s time we stop asking why people are in crisis and start asking why anyone stays here sober.
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