In a shocking turn of events for anyone who thought yelling into a vacuum was a recipe for immortality, local AM radio fixture Chad Hasty has passed away at the age of 43. Hasty, who spent over two decades ensuring that every West Texan’s morning commute was seasoned with exactly the right amount of political bile, reportedly died “peacefully in his sleep.” It’s a bit of a plot twist for a man who made a career out of making sure his listeners never had a moment of peace regarding “integrity” or “common sense.”
The local GOP elite didn’t waste a heartbeat before rushing to their keyboards to canonize the guy. Governor Abbott, Dustin Burrows, and every other politician who used Hasty’s microphone as a safe space to avoid actual hard questions are now weeping into their campaign funds. Burrows called him a “powerful voice for conservative truth,” which is Lubbock-speak for “the guy who let me talk for thirty minutes without mentioning my voting record.”
Beyond the political theater, Hasty was a “Lubbock institution,” a title we give to anyone who stays here longer than it takes to get a degree from Tech and doesn’t immediately flee for the Dallas suburbs. He was even appointed to the Texas Elections Advisory Committee by Dan Patrick, because if there’s one thing you want in an election advisor, it’s a guy whose professional success relied entirely on being as partisan as humanly possible.
The airwaves are currently filled with tributes and “special editions” of his show, as KFYO desperately tries to figure out who else can fill four hours of airtime with enough righteous indignation to keep the advertisers happy. It’s a tragic loss for the local political echo chamber, which has now lost its most reliable megaphone.
Now that the loudest voice in the Hub City has gone silent, do you think we’ll finally be able to hear the wind howling, or is the sound of local politicians patting themselves on the back still going to drown everything out?
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