Starting October 1, Lubbock homeowners now need to pay the city for the privilege of having an alarm system. Under Ordinance No. 2025-00111 — passed quietly in late summer — residents must shell out $50 a year for a permit if they want police to respond when their alarm goes off. Senior citizens get a discount (just $25), but everyone else pays full price to keep their own property safe.
The new law replaces the old “three-strikes” system — where fees kicked in only after multiple false alarms — with a citywide pay-to-play model. Now, no permit means no police response. The ordinance also includes a full menu of service fees: $50 per false alarm after three in a year, $75 after five, and $100 after eight. Rack up twelve, and the city can revoke your permit altogether, leaving you to guard your own house like it’s The Purge.
Alarm companies also get new paperwork duties: they must report every installation to the city within 30 days, hand out flyers explaining how not to trigger false alarms, and keep customer records available for police inspection. Meanwhile, residents are expected to keep their alarms well-maintained, manually reset after three triggers in a day, and make sure the siren stops within 15 minutes — presumably so it doesn’t drown out the sound of all that taxpayer money being vacuumed up.
Violators can be fined up to $500 per day, and all permits expire annually unless renewed with another fee. But don’t worry — the city promises it’s all for “public safety,” not revenue. After all, what’s $50 a year compared to the priceless feeling of knowing your local government can still find new ways to monetize anxiety?
Next up: a subscription tier for emergency response. Pay $50 for basic coverage, $100 for “priority dispatch,” and $200 if you’d like the officer to pretend to care.
