God forbid anything interrupts the holy sacrament of Texas Tech football. Our latest savior under center, transfer quarterback Brendan Sorsby, is currently locked in a legal deathmatch with the NCAA because—shocker—the rules against athletes gambling apparently apply to him, too. Sorsby took a leave of absence in April to address a gambling addiction that reportedly graduated from standard high school sports betting to deep-tier degeneracy in college, including wagering on Turkish basketball and Romanian soccer. Because nothing screams “future NFL star” quite like sweating out a third-tier Eastern European fútbol match at 3:00 a.m. from a Lubbock apartment.
Naturally, the Texas Tech administration executed a flawless corporate pivot. They officially declared Sorsby ineligible to play nice with the NCAA, while simultaneously whispering that they’re rushing to initiate the reinstatement process because his “health and well-being” are paramount. And by health, they clearly mean the health of the athletic department’s win-loss record. Sorsby’s legal team is demanding a temporary injunction hearing by June 15, which just happens to be exactly one week before the deadline for the NFL Supplemental Draft. Because if he can’t save Tech’s season, he might as well try to go get paid by the pros.
But the real comedy happened in the local courthouse. Lubbock County Judge Phillip Hays looked at the case on Wednesday, remembered he is a Texas Tech alum, and realized he couldn’t exactly pretend to be an objective arbiter of justice when the entire town’s autumn serotonin levels hang in the balance. Knowing that ruling against a Tech quarterback would make him a local pariah, Hays recused himself. Since finding a single qualified professional in Lubbock County who doesn’t have a Double-T tattooed on their soul is a statistical impossibility, the case had to be outsourced to Tarrant County Judge Ken Curry—a UT-Arlington and University of Houston grad who presumably doesn’t care about Red Raider football.
The temporary injunction hearing is now set for June 1, so we only have to wait a couple of weeks to find out if the legal system will validate our collective tradition of prioritizing football wins over institutional rules. But hey, if the Fort Worth judge rules in Sorsby’s favor, do you think he’ll let us know what the over/under is on the upcoming season?
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