Our beloved Texas Tech Board of Regents Chairman, Cody Campbell, recently sat down for a chat with EverythingLubbock.com to explain how beautifully the university handled the Brendan Sorsby gambling circus. In case you missed this multi-million-dollar soap opera, Sorsby—the transfer quarterback who managed to achieve legendary status in Lubbock without ever taking a single snap in an actual game—has officially packed his bags for the NFL supplemental draft. This comes right after a chaotic blitz of lawsuits involving the NCAA, the Big 12, and Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton. But don’t worry, the local lawsuit has been dismissed, meaning everyone gets to pay their own legal fees while our judicial system goes back to ignoring real problems.
Naturally, Campbell wants us to know this wasn’t an embarrassing logistical trainwreck where Tech simply ran out of time before the June 22nd draft deadline. No, it was a deeply spiritual journey about “doing the right thing”. According to Campbell, Tech thoroughly vetted Sorsby’s “character” before bringing him in, only to later discover he had a gambling addiction. Who could have foreseen that a college athlete might look at a betting app? Certainly not Tech’s crack recruiting team, who ultimately blamed the whole oversight on a “stroke of extremely bad luck”. Excellent detective work, everyone.
But here is the chef’s kiss of West Texas benevolence: despite never throwing a single pass for the Red Raiders, Sorsby is still walking away with a “significant amount” of NIL cash. Campbell proudly spun this as Tech “treating people the right way,” rather than, say, a massive waste of booster money on a guy who spent more time in a courtroom than a huddle. Apparently, the real villains here aren’t the guys breaking the rules, but the “hypocritical” media networks making money off gambling while setting “traps” for these poor, innocent, cash-flush student-athletes.
To top it all off, Campbell is using this local disaster to plug his very own piece of federal legislation, the Protect College Sports Act. Because nothing says “we have our house in order” quite like trying to rewrite national sports laws because your new quarterback couldn’t stay off DraftKings.
Hey, at least we can still look forward to a packed house this season, where we can confidently cheer on a team that Campbell promises will win the conference anyway. Who needs a starting quarterback when you have moral superiority?
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