Politics
The Texas Miracle: Ken Paxton Campaigns on the ‘Unborn’ While Rural Texans Try Not to Give Birth on Highway 84
Texas Attorney General, walking scandal magnet, and now U.S. Senate hopeful Ken Paxton is out on the campaign trail trying to convince us he’s the…
Thanks For Saving Us From A Raise, Ken: How Paxton’s 100-Lawsuit Binge Kept Texas Proud and Poorer
Remember in 2024 when the federal government threatened to force employers to pay overtime to…
Charles Perry Terrified That Lubbock Students Might Accidentally Read a Book
Our heroic State Senator Charles Perry recently graced a Lubbock ISD board meeting to save…
Great News, Lubbock: Flesh-Eating Maggots Are Devouring Texas Cattle, and the Feds Are Fresh Out of Horny Flies
The New World screwworm is officially in Texas, giving West Texas ranchers a horrifying new…
Great News, West Texas: Flesh-Eating Maggots Are Here to Ruin Your BBQ
Just when you thought living in West Texas couldn’t get any more dystopian—what with the…
Texas GOP Achieves Ultimate ‘Unity’ By Telling Muslim Conservatives to Get Out of the Country
The 2026 Texas State Republican Convention just wrapped up in Houston under the inspiring, totally-not-ironic…
Pissing Away Unity: Texas GOP Welcomes a Urinating Elephant and Boos Lubbock’s Own Dustin Burrows
Governor Greg Abbott wrapped up his convention speech in Houston by promising to “demolish” the…
Texas Tech and Ken Paxton Team Up to Prove Football is More Important Than Minor Things Like ‘The Law’
Only in Lubbock could a quarterback transfer in, get caught illegally wiring $90,000 out-of-state to…
Shocking Twist: Abbott Discovers ‘Regulation’ Isn’t a Dirty Word Now That AI Data Centers Are Set to Melt the Grid
Well, feather my nest and call me a prairie dog, because the unthinkable has happened.…
State Government Genius: Punishing Small Towns for Being Too Broke to Prove They’re Broke
Leave it to our brilliant lawmakers in Austin to cook up a bureaucratic paradox straight…